How do I get my husband home from a volunteered deployment?

My husband is in the Coast Guard and volunteered to spend a year in Bahrain to help better his career which in the long run would benefit our family. He has always been a great husband and an amazing father so when he sent me an email two days before Easter that he didn鈥檛 love me anymore I was shocked. He said he had been having these feelings for the past four years and never said anything to me about it. I am having trouble believing what he is saying as true, but the bottom line is I need him to come home so we can work on our marriage. We have three children and I am by myself dealing with this. He is playing softball and volleyball goes to the gym and I am here with the kids and taking care of everything else. He refuses to talk to me about it. He swears that it has nothing to with him cheating. I think he is just lost in a fantasy world and doesn鈥檛 want to face reality. Is there anyone I can talk to to get him home so we can at least try to work this out. He has another six months there but I feel that it might be to late to fix anything if he is gone that long. I also do not want this to ruin his career, but at this point I am kind of worried about him and what this will do to our family.How do I get my husband home from a volunteered deployment?
I'm sorry, but I don't think he is such a great husband to drop such a bomb like this under these circumstances. In the middle of a deployment, which you cannot change and while you are home minding the fort alone with three kids. He sounds very immature %26amp; extremely selfish to me, and to refuse to discuss it with you-that's terrible. Maybe you can talk to a marriage counselor by yourself for some guidance. Good luck to you, I know it must be very difficult.How do I get my husband home from a volunteered deployment?
I sware to you I have got that email a thousand times.. so have my friends its a typical deployment thing. there is no way he can come home unless a death of imidiate family. he WILL come to his sences if you need someone to talk to girl im here just email me! I have been through it and I know what it feels like
if he is deployed, then you are just gonna have to wait.
The only thing you can do is try to keep in contact with him, and tell him how much he means to you. Being far away, and having so much time to think, is probably making him say those things to you. Just keep on writing him, telling him that you don't think a divorce is the solution right now...tell him what you can do to make things right. If that's his final answer, and he wants a divorce....then there's nothing you can do...but having to deal with it
Well, U taking care of the home and kids is ur contribution to the marriage. U grumble that he doesn't help U out @ home. Do U go into work w/him 2 help him out in his job? No. So y are U upset that he goes out and plays sports and doesn't help out @ home?





Look, there is noway U can get him off a Voluntary deployment. He is there for another 6 months. Like it or not. And it very well might b too late now to work on your marriage. So I don't think that if he were to come home now it would b any better! Do u really think that if U caused him to loose his spot in this deployment that U are gonna look like anything good to him? This is where he wants to b right now. To better himself 4 his kids. And, like it or not, U need to accept that! I don't really think there is anything there to save! if he has been having these feelings for the last 4yrs..then he knows what he wants and has had time to make sure that it is what he wants. The best thing U can do is get on w/things. Get out there. Get a job. Get a place 4 U and the kids. And get custody/visitation set up. Don't b a troll about it either! Don't use the kids as a weapon against him! It will only come back and bite U in the a$$ in the end!
Wow I am happy I found your question. I am in the same situation, my husband volunteered and is in Iraq after a year he is due home in 2 weeks. He did it to better his career and our lifes. We have been together 4 years and have a son. All the sudden he started online dating 2 months ago and now thinks he can have a happier life without me. I am crushed. He has started to apologize and there are ups and downs now but I can't believe he is doing this to us.





Military life changes guys. And there is no way you can get him home unless something happens health wise that is major to you or your kids. To be honest the divorce rate for the deployed is over 60%. He is probably cheating or going through stuff watching his buddies get cheated on. I am sorry to say that but I don't want to down play it. I wish you the best but you need to start think what if you split up. Do you have your own car, a place to live etc. These guys can get nasty and you need to have a plan.
The military isn't going to send him home because he said he doesn't love you anymore. They don't really care. All he is to them is property, and they're not going to willingly give that up when he's doing a service they need. He's probably all twisted up from being deployed, but the fact that he volunteered would have been a red flag for me. That's a bit weird. I mean, yeah it looks good on his career, but his career is a lifetime thing and family is supposed to be so why would be willingly leave you with his children so he can deploy for a year? You might want to address that issue first.